Half & Half - Season 2

First aired: 9/15/2003 24 episodes

Episodes

1. The Big Mis-Conception Episode (1)

Aired: 9/15/2003

Dee Dee and Big Dee Dee plan a ""surprise"" party for Charles and Big Dee Dee's 24th wedding anniversary. While putting together a slide show, Dee Dee discovers that there are very few photographs of Mona with their father. She feels sorry for her sister and makes several attempts to cheer her up (first creating fake photos of the two, then trying to set up a lunch date for Mona and Charles), but only angers her further. Mona explains that she had accepted the fact that she and her father didn't have the closest relationship, but Dee Dee is inadvertently opening the wounds. Phyllis produces evidence that proves Charles wasn't quite as distant as it seems. Spencer develops an attraction to Camille, a photographer working with Delicious Records artists. Adam constantly tries to alert Mona about Spencer's feelings for her. He finally tells her the truth, but they discover that Spencer is involved with Camille. Meanwhile, Dee Dee becomes annoyed when her ""summer fling"" starts to get

2. The Big Mis-Conception Episode (2)

Aired: 9/22/2003

Dee Dee takes a pregnancy test, although Mona feels that she might be overreacting (her period is only a day late). Before Dee Dee can check the results, her mother bursts and demands to use the bathroom. Big Dee Dee also takes a pregnancy test, which turns out to be positive. She is startled, but she and Charles quickly accept the news. Big Dee Dee gets to rub her pregnancy in the face of Phyllis, who had believed Big Dee Dee was going through menopause. Mona is upset to realize that Spencer has been seeing Camille for some time, but hadn't confided in her. He claims that he wanted to keep quiet until he knew the relationship could last. Phyllis chastises Mona for letting ""her"" man get away, while Adam refuses to believe that Spencer is over Mona. He insists that he is happy with Camille, adding that Mona would never want him anyway. Mona patches things up with Spencer and says that she is very happy for him.

3. The Big Keep Your Eyes Off My Prize Episode

Aired: 9/29/2003

Aspiring politician Ron Brown shows up at Mona's door in search of votes, and takes a liking to her. Phyllis quickly pushes him to ask her out, and they agree to a date. Mona then learns that Big Dee Dee recently arranged a date for Dee Dee and Ron, who have been friends since childhood. The sisters are unsure about dating the same man, but their mothers insist that it will be all right (as it is unlikely that both will be compatible with Ron). Phyllis and Big Dee Dee treat the whole thing as a personal competition. Mona and Dee Dee like Ron, but decide that he isn't worth the potential damage to their relationship. They agree to do the ""mature"" thing and stop dating Ron, but each keeps seeing him behind the other's back.

4. The Big Birth-quake Episode

Aired: 10/6/2003

Mona tells her friends and family that she doesn't want to celebrate her birthday, as she would rather spend the day alone in quiet reflection. However, she soon becomes extremely bored. She is relieved when Big Dee Dee shows up, although she has actually forgotten Mona's birthday and is just there to see Dee Dee. The two go down to the laundry room in pursuit of Big Dee Dee's dog, and wind up trapped when an earthquake hits. They share a picnic lunch and have a revealing talk about their relationship. Meanwhile, Phyllis tracks down Charles to try to convince him to help buy a car for Mona's birthday, and they wind up stuck in an elevator. The earthquake also traps Dee Dee, Adam and Spencer in an upscale store as they shop for Mona's gift. Everyone is embarrassed when Spencer has a panic attack after the earthquake.

5. The Big No-Substitutions Please Episode

Aired: 10/13/2003

After Dee Dee loses her old room to the baby and Big Dee Dee misses several appointments, Dee Dee begins to worry that the baby is forcing her out of her parents' life. She suffers from so much stress that she has a breakdown and hears a doll talking to her. Mona recommends that she make an appointment with Phyllis to discuss her problem. She says that she feels as though she is the only one who is worried about the way the baby will change her life. Phyllis assures her that her reaction is perfectly natural and that she should air her concerns with Big Dee Dee. Before she gets around to it, Big Dee Dee admits to her own anxieties about the child's birth, and thanks Dee Dee for her support. The conversation reassures Dee Dee about her importance in her mother's life. Meanwhile, Spencer continually cancels on Mona because of plans with Camille. She looks to Adam to take his place, but Adam isn't too thrilled about this.

6. The Big Butting In Episode

Aired: 10/20/2003

Hoping to prove herself to her father, Dee Dee goes against his wishes and tries to personally handle a tenant who has failed to pay rent for the last few months. She must come up with a new plan of attack after the man retaliates by threatening to expose several building code violations involving Dee Dee's apartment. Meanwhile, Mona reluctantly takes her mother out on the town. She feels crowded when Phyllis begins showing up regularly at her hangout and playing matchmaker for the patrons.

7. The Big Foot in My Mouth Episode

Aired: 11/3/2003

After another failed relationship, Mona decides to focus on her career for a while. She is determined to help Zora, a promising young singer, secure a contract with the record company. Zora mistakes Mona's efforts to boost her confidence for romantic interest and develops feelings for her. She confesses her crush to Adam, who keeps the news to himself so that he can watch the sparks fly. Mona struggles to come up with a way to handle the situation without hurting Zora's feelings. Meanwhile, Dee Dee dates a man who pays way too much attention to her feet.

8. The Big Forbidden Fruit Episode

Aired: 11/10/2003

Phyllis announces that she has been seeing someone for the past month. She reluctantly agrees to bring her boyfriend, Earl, to the apartment to meet the girls. Earl is handsome, sweet and romantic, and leaves everyone (including Big Dee Dee) sufficiently impressed. Dee Dee sees Earl at a restaurant with another woman, and learns that it is his wife. Mona and Dee Dee try to break the news to Phyllis, and are stunned to discover that she already knew that Earl is married. She believes that he is separated and about to get a divorce. Mona and Dee Dee try to convince her to stop seeing him. Meanwhile, Spencer discovers that being attached has suddenly made him virtually irresistible to other women.

9. The Big College Admission Episode

Aired: 11/17/2003

Spencer's cousin Chauncey begins working in the mail room at the record company and blabbing everyone's secrets. He recalls the time in college that he walked in on Spencer and Mona apparently in the midst of a drunken tryst, creating friction between Spencer and Camille. The story prompts Mona to confront her feelings for Spencer, as she wonders if the reason she has been so jealous of his girlfriends is because she wants him for herself. Meanwhile, Dee Dee creates a mold of her mother's pregnant belly--which Big Dee Dee hates.

10. The Big Bitter Baby Shower Episode

Aired: 11/24/2003

Dee Dee's cousin Barbara comes to town for Big Dee Dee's baby shower, and stays with Mona because there is no room at Dee Dee's place. Mona is furious to learn from Barbara that Dee Dee shared things that Mona had told her in confidence about the effect her mother's bitterness has had on her feelings about marriage. Mona gives Dee Dee the silent treatment, but later has a talk with Phyllis about her fears. Big Dee Dee dreads the shower because she knows the guests will insist on touching her belly. Meanwhile, Spencer gets a makeover from Adam and some friends in the hopes of impressing Camille's social crowd.

11. The Big How the Ex Stole Christmas Episode

Aired: 12/15/2003

Dee Dee invites everyone over to her parents' house for Christmas. The Bay Area experiences a heatwave, which leads to a brownout that nearly ruins dinner. Spencer angrily declines Mona's invitation, as the holiday brings up many issues about his absent father. Mona later offers to help Spencer track down his father. Phyllis brings her new boyfriend, a Santa Claus she met at the children's hospital, but both she and Charles object when the man refuses to keep his hands off of her. Neil calls Dee Dee and asks to come over and speak with her. She believes that he wants her back, and is stunned when he instead announces plans to marry. She tries to use the heat to her advantage in an attempt to win back Neil, while Mona urges her to just move on.

12. The Big Double Date With My Mate Episode

Aired: 1/12/2004

Camille sets up Mona on a date with her best friend, the handsome and engaging Carlo, whom she hasn't seen for years. Mona is thrilled when she and Carlo hit it off, and believes he might be a long-term boyfriend prospect. However, Carlo is actually in love with Camille and wants to pursue a relationship with her. Meanwhile, Dee Dee and Big Dee Dee are desperate to find out the sex of the baby, while Charles insists that they should wait until the birth. The women try to go behind his back to the doctor.

13. The Big You're Not the Boss of Me Episode

Aired: 2/9/2004

Delicious Records is bought out; and a new boss, respected music business veteran Kai Owens, takes over the company. She is bringing many of her own associates along, so she begins conducting interviews to see which employees will get to keep their jobs. Adam, exhilarated by all of the drama, giddily celebrates each new firing by banging a gong. Mona fears that she will be the next to go because she is terrible in interviews. Despite Dee Dee's advice, she blows the interview. However, Kai respects her work so much that she promotes her to a Vice President position. This makes her Spencer's boss, and he has trouble adjusting to the situation, ignoring her orders and talking back to her. Mona worries that they will not be able to maintain their friendship. Meanwhile, Dee Dee pleads with her mother to let her make a connection with her unborn brother in some way. Big Dee Dee offers to let her name the baby.

14. The Big Love Is Here and Now You're Gone Episode

Aired: 2/16/2004

Camille returns from a vacation in London and behaves coldly toward Spencer. She finally admits that she is desperately homesick and has decided to move back to England. Phyllis upsets Mona by giving her a gift, a cat she saved from a shelter. (She sees it as a sign that Phyllis has given up on Mona ever giving her grandchildren.) Big Dee Dee decides to record a song as a birth announcement. Mona helps Dee Dee and Big Dee Dee search for an affordable studio. Mona meets Nick, the charming and handsome producer who runs one of the studios. They immediately hit it off and make a date. She has to cancel to tend to Spencer, but Nick is understanding, and later shows up with food. Dee Dee counsels Spencer and encourages him to tell Camille his feelings. He is devastated to find that she was about to leave without saying goodbye. She says that she enjoyed their relationship, but that it moved too quickly for her. Mona doesn't have enough time to look after the cat, so she gives it

15. The Big I Haven't Got the Vegas Idea Episode

Aired: 2/23/2004

Mona tries to find time alone with Nick, but her mother and Dee Dee can't seem to get the message. Dee Dee's longtime friend Aurora comes for a visit. She was once extremely obese, but has now experienced a dramatic weight loss, thanks to a gastric bypass surgery. She is not used to having men pay attention to her, and Dee Dee worries about the fact that she seems to overreact whenever someone pays her a compliment. Meanwhile, Spencer tries to get over his break-up with Camille by hooking up with virtually every woman in the Bay Area. Dee Dee tries to keep him away from Aurora, as she believes she could get hurt. Adam is upset when everyone begins to bail out of his big ""28th"" (or 27th, 26th, 25th or 23rd) birthday bash in Las Vegas. Spencer and Aurora wake up naked and hung over in a Vegas hotel room, and Adam tells them they got married. A panicked Dee Dee, unable to find Aurora, interrupts Mona's romantic weekend with Nick. They learn what has happened to Spencer and Aurora

16. The Big Labor of Love Episode

Aired: 3/1/2004

The Thornes' plans for a well-orchestrated C-section go by the wayside when Big Dee Dee goes into labor three weeks earlier than expected. A panicked Dee Dee turns to Mona for help. Mona handles the situation beautifully, helping Big Dee Dee get to the hospital and deal with complications such as an overly perky new nurse; and having the delivery handled by a pregnant doctor who is a week past her due date and more than a little bitter about it. Dee Dee begins to resent Mona's calm demeanor and helpful nature, especially after Big Dee Dee sends her daughter out to find a doctor and asks Mona to stay in the room. Meanwhile, Spencer and Phyllis try to track down Charles, who has gone away to a men's retreat at an isolated cabin. Mona finally confronts Dee Dee and eases her jealousy by reminding her that she can simply lie and pretend that she was useful at the birth. Charles arrives just after Big Dee Dee gives birth to their son, Drew Christian. Big Dee Dee comes up with an ""offi

17. The Big Typecast Episode

Aired: 3/29/2004

Dee Dee organizes a singles mixer at a local club. She bristles at Mona's claim that she only dates a certain type of man (well-groomed and upwardly mobile), and tries to prove her wrong by picking up a tough guy named Keno. She takes off with him on his motorcycle and joins him at a bar, where she rides a mechanical bull. She has a good time exploring this new side of herself--until she runs into a very angry woman who claims to be Keno's girlfriend. Mona and Nick crash the mixer and meet up with his ex-girlfriend, Raquel. Mona is disturbed to discover that Raquel is her dead ringer, and fears that Nick is just with her because of the resemblance. Meanwhile, Dee Dee must actually care for Drew herself after firing the nanny. She is mortified when she must turn to Phyllis for help when her son will not stop crying.

18. The Big Good Help Is Hard to Fire Episode

Aired: 3/29/2004

Kai orders Mona to exercise some of her new power as a vice president by firing Adam. She feels terrible about doing this to her friend, but acknowledges that he isn't a very good receptionist and finally breaks the news to him. Adam is furious and refuses to take any of her calls. Mona later learns that Kai never wanted her to fire Adam (who constantly sucks up to her and shares all the gossip), and had him confused with someone else. Mona must track down Adam at his new job handing out sausage samples at the mall and convince him to put aside his pride and return. Meanwhile, Big Dee Dee hires an accomplished and extremely hot male nanny to care for Drew, but realizes she must let him go after she and Dee Dee spend all of their time fantasizing about the man.

19. The Big Practice What You Preach Episode

Aired: 4/12/2004

With Drew's christening approaching, Mona and Dee Dee vie for the right to be their brother's godmother. They grow increasingly competitive as they buy him gifts and try to impress Charles and Big Dee Dee. While driving home from a shopping trip, Dee Dee takes a cheap shot at Mona when she brings up the fact that she is only Drew's half-sister. Big Dee Dee is appalled by this statement and urges Dee Dee to apologize to Mona as soon as possible. Meanwhile, Phyllis tags along to church with Mona and Spencer and begins making a play for the handsome widowed pastor. She soon finds some unexpected competition in the form of a very forceful church member who is just as determined to make the pastor her man.

20. The Big Employee Benefits Episode

Aired: 4/26/2004

Dee Dee vies with her law school rival, Stephanie Seymour, for a summer internship. Dee Dee believes that she is the more qualified candidate; but Stephanie sucks up to the man in charge, Mr. Washington. She also tries to use her sex appeal to her advantage, so Dee Dee retaliates by showing up for her final interview in a revealing outfit. She gets the job, but Mr. Washington's comments and behavior prompt her to fear that she got the job for the wrong reasons--and that her new boss might want something in return. Meanwhile, Kai develops a crush on Spencer and asks Mona to pass along this information to him. Spencer is thrilled, and decides to get involved with Kai and try to use her for career advancement. However, he panics when she starts talking about a relationship during their first date.

21. The Big Mother of a Mother's Day Rides Again Episode

Aired: 5/3/2004

Big Dee Dee, Phyllis, Mona and Dee Dee make plans to spend Mother's Day together at a brunch/concert. Mona is surprised to learn that Dee Dee plans to get Phyllis a present. She scrambles to find something appropriate for Big Dee Dee. Big Dee Dee grows tired of receiving gifts meant for the baby and is thrilled with Mona's gift of Louis Vuitton luggage. This upsets both Dee Dee and Phyllis, who had already bristled at the fact that Mona was spending more time with Big Dee Dee. Phyllis starts complaining about her gift (even though it is the watch she repeatedly requested). Dee Dee suddenly gives Phyllis a diamond bracelet in an attempt at one-upmanship. At the brunch, Phyllis and Big Dee Dee discover that their gifts may not have been as thoughtful as it seemed. Everyone is at each other's throats, until the bathroom attendant, separated from her family for the day, forces the mothers to see the error of their ways. Meanwhile, Charles and Spencer watch Drew while the women are

22. The Big Fetish What You Started Episode

Aired: 5/10/2004

Dee Dee runs into Clay, her ex-boyfriend with the foot fetish. He tells her that he has gotten treatment for his problem, and asks to start seeing her again. Dee Dee is not interested, but Mona and Big Dee Dee convince her that he is a good guy who deserves another chance. Dee Dee follows their advice and is very happy with Clay. However, Mona and Big Dee Dee catch him rolling around half-naked with a bunch of Dee Dee's shoes. He begs them not to share this with Dee Dee, but quickly has another relapse. Meanwhile, Spencer may lose his job after he fails to clear samples on a new album. The original artist, funk singer Otis Wright, has no interest in allowing the use of his music. However, Spencer catches a lucky break when Otis develops a mutual attraction with one of his biggest fans, Phyllis.

23. The Big Rules of Engagement Episode

Aired: 5/17/2004

Nick tells Mona that his parents are coming to town for the weekend, and that he would like her to meet them. Mona is very nervous, as she has never met the parents of any of her boyfriends. Nick's parents are decidedly less than thrilled by the fact that their son is dating another black woman. Mona cannot understand why they dislike her, and asks Dee Dee to help win them over. Dee Dee suspects that they are racist, and they overhear the couple making remarks that prove this. Dee Dee recommends that Mona discuss the situation with Nick. However, before she can bring up the subject, Nick proposes. Mona immediately accepts. Phyllis, Dee Dee and a jealous Spencer pretend to be happy for her, but are actually worried. Dee Dee tells Mona that she cannot just ignore the attitude of Nick's parents. Mona admits that she got caught up in the moment and isn't ready to marry Nick. She wants to go on dating; but when he cannot get any reassurance that she might want to marry him one da

24. The Big My Lover, My Brother Episode

Aired: 5/17/2004

Dee Dee assigns herself the task of personally helping Mona get over her break-up with Nick. She spends nearly every minute with her and forces her to attend an exercise class. Spencer and Mona plan to go away on a road trip, but Dee Dee forbids this because she is afraid of what might happen. While having lunch, Mona and Dee Dee run into Phyllis and her boyfriend, Ray. He is a popular local disc jockey whom she met after calling in a traffic tip. Dee Dee invites them to a dinner her parents are organizing in honor of her new internship. Mona finally ditches Dee Dee and goes to see Spencer. They discuss the fact that they are doing well after their break-ups, and how lucky they are to have each other. They begin kissing passionately, but Mona quickly leaves. Dee Dee is horrified, but Mona says that it felt right. Spencer confesses what happened to Adam, who warns him that Mona is still fragile but thinks they would be good together. At Dee Dee's dinner, Phyllis announces tha