America's Funniest Home Videos - Season 14

1. Kids Korner, Disorganized Sports and Thought Bubble Theater

Aired: 9/28/2003

The 14th-season premiere introduces ""Thought Bubble Theater,"" where videos are paused and pop-up bubbles reveal participants' thoughts. Also: a man's attempt to uproot a tree by tying it to his car; ""31 Trampoline Mishaps In 34 Seconds""; talking dogs; a musical montage of cats. George Lopez does the ""Celebrity Pick of the Week."" Finalists: 'The Collision Kid' (Winner), 'Canine Chaos' (2nd Place), and 'Ramp Champ' (3rd place).

2. Linguine Greenie and Sibling Rivalry

Aired: 10/5/2003

People being surprised; the world's largest third grader; a montage of people falling to ""Jump Jive An' Wail""; a limousine driver who needs to go back to driving school; sibling rivarly, including a little girl trying to box up her brother and mail him; people who are doomed from the start; whipped Cream surprises; Part 1 of ""The AFV Art Section""; rude interruptions; the ongoing battle between cats and kids; rolling (things, animals ... and people) to the musical sound of Mistro; the fastest way to wash a bike; ""The Book of Why"" humorously answers some of life's most compelling questions, such as ""Why mom is having a bad hair day"", ""Why animal testing isn't all bad"", ""Why the driveway isn't finished"", and ""Why the price of wheat is skyrocketing""; toasts gone bad; a hungry kid who just can't wait until the cookies are done; and a man who frightens his wife by giving their baby a pacifier that looks like a rat. 'Linguini Greedy' (Winner)

3. Fetch is for Puppies, Video Guide to Fishing, and Tom's Home Movies

Aired: 10/12/2003

People who don't focus; Low-tech accidents; Wacky animals to the sound of 'Not Unusual' by Tom Jones; ""Tom's Home Movies""; A human and a bear have a stand-off over who's going to get the pickup truck; People reliving their childhoods; Annoying kids; ""Thought Bubble Theater""; A cat playing with a mouse who is ""digging"" into a shoe; A track-and-field cheater; Unpredictable videos; A montage of destruction to the music from the opera 'Carmen'; Abnormal dog behavior; ""AFV's Guide to Fishing""; People who need to practice their skill a bit more; and in ""Naughty Files,"" a baby pees on its brother upon the mentioning of the word 'bath'. Finalists: 'Dynamite Kids' (Winner), 'Feathered Freak Out' (2nd Place), and 'The Fast and the Fuzziest' (3rd place).

4. Animals with Attitude, My Big Fat Geek Wedding, and Scared Stoopid

Aired: 10/19/2003

People pull scary practical jokes; Stage mess-ups and stage falls; Things animals shouldn't be allowed to do; A grizzly bear sucks on a passifier that was dropped into his tank; Parents who are were proud of their kids; An insect plagues a bride; Marrying into the wrong gene pool; Tom tests the new set, which reacts to his feelings by changing color; The dog who will never have fleas; Halloween antics; A guy who learns the principle 'Let Sleeping Dogs Lie' the hard way; Funny babies; A musical montage of people getting hit by fling objects to music from the movie The Day the Earth Stood Still; A dog holding a tennis ball in the air with his front paws; A dog who needs to work on his stage presense; Strange abilities of the body; and ""Naughty Files"". Finalists: 'Mouthy Minister' (Winner), 'I Do. . .Who?' (2nd Place), and 'Skeleton In Closet' (3rd place).

5. The Greatest Groin Hits, Macho Mishaps, and the Classic Nincompoop

Aired: 11/2/2003

Clips from over a decade of embarrassing moments; Boneheads from the past; ""The Greatest Groin Hits""; Ice/snow hits, falls, and rolls; Jim Belushi and Courtney Thorne-Smith from According To Jim wish AFV a haapy 300th episode; Dizzy Clips; past hosts including Bob Saget, Daisy Fuentes and John Fugelsang; ""Tom's Home Videos""; ""Then and Now"" with winning videos from past years including ""Astigma-Tizzy"" and ""Towel Butt Baby""; Jennifer Garner and Ron Rifkin appear; ""Mini Men""; ""30 Points In 40 Seconds""; ""Those Disgusting Animals""; Classic Nincompoops; The women from the View; Brides On Fire VS. Trees Crushing Cars; ""Little Women""; ""'I Do' Don'ts""; and the Best of the ""Naughty Files"".

6. Kitten Kaboodle, the Barking Lot, and Tae Kwan Dope

Aired: 11/9/2003

Ladies clips; ""Kitten Kaboodle"", the classic cat clips; More ""Greatest Groin Clips""; Wedding faints; Kids that should be listened to; ""Tom's Home Movies""; Bathroom humor; Sara Rue and Andy Dick from Less Than Perfect tell everyone what their favorite kinds of videos are; Practical jokes; ""Critter Titters""; ""Then and Now""; Abusement Parks; ""The Barking Lot""; ""Kitchen Klutzes""; Raven-Symone from That's So Raven wishes AFV a happy 300th episode; ""Rugrat Roundup""; A recap of past winners; Montage of classic rollers; The naughtiest clips from over a decade; The ""Greatest Groin Hit"" is revealed; and Tom Bergeron and the rest of the AFV crew thank Vin DiBona for his hard work on the show over all the years. ""Greatest Groin Hits"" Winner: 'Pool Fool'.

7. Reindeer Games, Destruction Junction, and You Must Be Joking

Aired: 11/30/2003

Bad luck magnets; friendly accidents; jumps; ""Nincompoop Corner""; a man grapples with a bee hive; the difference between man and animal; ""26 Spritzes In 24 Seconds""; the first time curiosity ever cleaned the cat; funny accidents in slow motion, with a play-by-play by host Tom Bergeron about just what went wrong; ""The Flame Game""; cats and dogs; in a low-cost production of The Wizard of Oz, a dog refuses to cooperate as Toto on stage; wild sports videos set to music; poise; threesomes; and ""Naughty File."" Finalists: 'Toddler Roulette' (Winner), 'Toto Recall' (2nd Place), and 'Macaw Guffaw' (3rd place).

8. Santa Claus Versus the Easter Bunny, Not So Wise Men, and the Grinch Who Gave Fake Lotto Tickets

Aired: 12/7/2003

Fake lotto tickets; ""Not So Wise Men""; People who display their emotions well; A school Christmas performance featuring kids who can't spell; People who need to take a Christmas refresher course; ""Wet Nosed Wonders""; 34 Sneezes In 26 Seconds; Santa Claus VS. The Easter Bunny; People shooting a video with the intention of getting on AFV; People in costumes making fools of themselves; Losing a shoe; A woman who gets her arm caught in a common kitchen appliance; Christmas morning chaos; Snowy and icy accidents; A bear steals campers' food; ""Merry Christmas from Our Staff""; ""Naughty Files""; and ""Classic Nincompoops."" Finalists: 'Back to the Belfry' (Winner), 'Caught on Tape' (2nd Place), and 'Treadmill Trauma' (3rd place).

9. The Animals Strike Back, Good Sports, and Thanks for Helping, Now Stop

Aired: 1/11/2004

Clips of animals causing chaos at home; ""Nincompoop Corner""; a man who goes for a boat ride and loses his dentures along the way; sports mishaps; Fake Dinosaurs VS. Dudes In Drag; Innocent Bystaners; ""Thanks for Helping, Now Stop""; a boy who goes bowling and ends up dropping the ball on his dad's foot; and a firefighter who loses control of a high powered hose; ""What's In His Shirt""; running into things; pole vaulting accidents; sleeping on the 'job'; ""The Naughty Files""; and ""The Best of the Babies."" Finalists: 'Sonic Youth' (Winner), 'Piñata Pirate' (2nd Place), and 'Flush With Success' (3rd place).

10. Into the Mouths of Babes, 31 Cake Splats in 36 Seconds, and Kid's Corner

Aired: 1/25/2004

Weddings gone wrong; babies doing the darndest things; funny signs; a teenage boy having a really bad hair day after his buddies decide to give him a haircut.

11. Kids Sneezing into Baked Goods Versus Men Who Scream Like Girls

Aired: 2/7/2004

12. All Animal Extravaganza

Aired: 2/15/2004

It's an ""All Animal Extravaganza,"" as a special edition of America's Funniest Home Videos goes to the dogs, the cats and just about every critter in-between for a collection of hilarious videos. Guest stars from the San Diego Zoo, including a cheetah and an anteater, join host Tom Bergeron in the studio. Videos include talking cats; wild dogs; animals at play; why dogs are better than cats; ""Tom's Home Movies"" involving animals; ""Featured Creatures""; a montage of birds on the attack; fish bites; ""Babies Goosing Dogs VS. Cats Running Into Walls""; bugs; ""The Naughty File;"" on safari. Finalists: 'Smitten with a Kitten' (Winner), 'Pumpkin-Headed Pooch' (2nd Place), and 'Cat on the Attack' (3rd place).

13. Dirty Rotten Kids, My Strange Playdate, and You're Young For That

Aired: 2/22/2004

Videos of a cat who sings duets with his owner, a little boy who stuffs an amazing amount of spaghetti up his nose, a piñata party gone amok and a mouthy little old lady minister who has the last word at a noisy wedding are among the finalists for the $100,000 grand prize. For the first time ever, votes for the grand prize will also be taken from viewers who logged on to abc.com, as well as members of the ""America's Funniest Home Videos"" studio audience.

14. AFV Looks at Home Improvement Mishaps

Aired: 3/7/2004

Teeth removal; zooming in; bike acciddents; weather conditions; ""23 Wake Ups In 40 Seconds""; messy children; wedding proposals; animal escapes; baseball . Finalists: 'Tooth From a Youth' (Winner), 'Little Runaway' (2nd Place), and 'Flower Child' (3rd place).

15. Solo Screamer, Thought Bubble Theater, and Are You Sleeping?

Aired: 3/14/2004

Something scares everyone; troubled animals; a scary bear; payback; underwear; Monday mishaps; wedding clips; slow motion; a prank on a firefighter; man vs. duck in slow motion; a tricked office worker.

16. Snow Business, Dogs Doing Things That Dogs Don't Do, and Failure is an Option

Aired: 3/21/2004

What bored kids do; learning can be painful; a boy who's not pleased when he learns he's getting a little sister; people who lack even one good idea; the perils of weightlifting; the top reasons why cats really are better than dogs; padding the résumé; ""Kids Sneezing Into Baked Goods VS. Men Who Scream Like Girls""; water accidents; a cat teaches a dog to roll over; a clever mouse makes an amazing escape from a trap; a mouse chases a cat; special mice and hamsters; ""AFV Video Dictionary""; ""The Naughty File""; and soccer fun. Finalists: 'Captain Cardboard' (Winner), 'Bikini Biter' (2nd Place), and 'Keyboard Bungle' (3rd place).

17. Puddy Tats, Name That Sound, and Have You Seen the Little Piggies

Aired: 3/28/2004

Funny practical jokes, including one woman giving her hubby a chilly wake up call; canines doing the craziest things, including a bulldog who skateboards like a pro; gaseous kids; unsuccessful aviation; ""Tom's Home Videos""; big misses; would-be lumberjacks who have a close encounter with a tree; jumping heart rates; and roller skating mishaps.

18. Babies Scooching Across the Floor Versus Brides Being Thrown Off Horses

Aired: 4/11/2004

Video highlights include surveillance camera footage that captures what happens when the roof really does falls in; kittens doing the funniest things; a montage of would-be winners' reactions to prank lotto tickets; hilarious pet tricks, including a canine thief who likes his bread fresh from the oven; and ""Tom's Home Movies.""

19. AFV's Guide to Parenting

Aired: 4/18/2004

Clips of great basketball shots and funny skateboarding feats; a package of hilarious wedding moments, including a groom who yawns during his own nuptials; and a husband and wife bickering over just how to work the video camera are all highlights.

20. AFV's Guide to Parenting

Aired: 5/2/2004

21. AFV's No Brain No Pain

Aired: 5/16/2004

A ""No Brain, No Pain"" episode salutes knuckleheads everywhere, including one overwhelmed bride who forgets her new husband's name; groomsmen with a big surprise for a bride and groom at their reception when they drop their drawers; a woman who pulls a practical joke on her boss by dressing in a bear costume; and what happens when raccoons decide to take over one lady's patio.

22. $100,000 Contest, AFV's Fairy Tales, and Bone Biting Boneheads

Aired: 5/23/2004

Some of the most hilarious clips of the season are in the running for the $100,000 grand prize, including ""Bike Yikes,"" where a little boy's bike stunt hits him where it really hurts; ""Captain Cardboard,"" silly home movies that chronicle the adventures of ""Super Nerd""; ""Their Cup is Half Full,"" where two young little leaguers ponder the real reason for their protective cups; and ""Solo Screamer,"" where a previously shy kid finds his voice big time in the middle of a Christmas concert.