Brainiac: Science Abuse - Season 3

First aired: 8/25/2005 9 episodes

Episodes

1. Episode 1

Aired: 8/25/2005

Can you swim as fast through syrup as you can through water. We check wind speed down at the lab. We find out why you shouldn’t muck around with lawnmowers. Electricity goes on tour. What is Britain’s stickiest fixer. Can you open an umbrella underwater. Do clever people have heavier heads. Is it possible to get drunk without drinking. And carefully does it – by popular demand, we’ve tracked down the most dangerous chemical yet – stand by for Thermite.

2. Episode 2

Aired: 9/1/2005

Pants or tights – which is the best DIY bungee. Can you play fruit machines for free. We inflict more suffering down at the lab. Stand well back, we put more stuff in a microwave and more caravans into orbit. What is the best way to get rid of stinky breath. Which is the scariest ride at the funfair. What’s the best food to use in a food fight. What’s the best alternative hair removal product. Lad v Lass tests which is better when remembering things about people.

3. Episode 3

Aired: 9/8/2005

Bunging things in microwaves, stuffing your face full of chocolate and chucking dry food down your neck. Also, we throw brainiacs around to make them throw up. We inflict more mindless destruction on innocent caravans. Is the anything you can do the night before to prevent you getting a hangover the next day. Lad v Lass discovers which is better at telling colours apart.

4. Episode 4

Aired: 9/15/2005

We race against high explosives. We show you why you shouldn’t put dynamite in your microwave. We tell you how to win on the fairground grabber. Jon Tickle puts his foot down in garlic. What happens if you suck in helium then blow into a wind instrument. Which is the best way to eat peas. How far will a pencil write. Which is Britain’s slidiest food. Men vs Women - who spends the longer in the toilet. Lad v Lass discovers which is better in a staring contest.

5. Episode 5

Aired: 9/22/2005

We take on the world’s best at darts – Brainiac style. Testing to destruction – microwaves and washing machines. Answering the big ones down at the warehouse. Burning through our cash with the help of Thermite. Quiet please – more splintering caravans on the 18th green. Is it possible to do a 360 on a swing. Which is Britain’s stickiest spread. Does dipping somebody’s hand in warm water while asleep make them wet themselves. Can you lose weight in a lift. Which is Britain’s noisiest food. Top tips for winning at laser games. Which is the fastest fast food. Blondes have more fun – do they. Lad v Lass discovers which is it best to be in identifying smells.

6. Episode 6

Aired: 10/6/2005

What not to grab if you jump out of a building. Not for the faint hearted – experiments on roller coasters. Getting down to the big questions down at the lab. What is Britain’s stretchiest food. We perform an eggsperiment on Brainiac Joe. How permanent is a permanent marker. What is the quickest way to send a text. Going on a picnic – how to tell it’s not going to rain. Does eating floaty foods produce floaty poo. Can the carbon dioxide wheelchair win in a race. Cutting up onions – what should you do if you don’t want to blub in the kitchen. Lad v Lass discovers which is better at remembering.

7. Episode 7

Aired: 10/13/2005

Bangs and crashes – we have plenty. Where’s the most painful place to rip out a hair. Brainiacs soak up more bad treatment for science. What household objects to grab in a civil war. If you eating popping candy and drink cola will your stomach explode. Which is the most absorbent fibre. Which is the fastest way to go down the funfair slide. When it’s raining, should you walk or run. What is the best way to beef up a conker. What is the best way to eat spaghetti.

8. Episode 8

Aired: 10/27/2005

It’s the last show in the series and we’re going out with a bang. Bunging the whole lot into a couple of microwaves – stand well back. We find out how to win at the dogs and the funfair arcade. What chemicals not to put in your spin dryer. Which is Britain’s best dunking biscuit. Do different foods do strange things to your wee. Does eating fish improve your brain power. We wave goodbye to a brainiac – where not to hide when the bomb goes up.

9. Christmas Cracker

Aired: 12/20/2005

Slip sliding away – CO2 power hits the ice. What to do if Santa gets stuck up your chimney. Knife, fork, spoon – which is Britain’s best bit of cutlery. Which is Britain’s most pain in the arse packaging. Jon Tickle gets in some seasonal slobbering. A gas oven, some explosives and a naked flame – you do the maths. Brainiacs feel the cold this xmas. Hitting the high notes – carol singing on helium. We give the five top tips for snowball fights. And what would happen if you pulled 500 crackers at once?