Pets - Season 1

1. Christmas

Aired: 5/5/2001

JP believes it is Christmas in the middle of March, and so to humour him, the other Pets decide to hold the event. Unfortunately, disaster strikes when the house is invaded by burglars.

2. Pregnant

Aired: 5/12/2001

After a wild party, a hungover Hamish is told by JP and Trevor that he had sex with Davina while he was drunk, and three months later it is revealed that she is pregnant.

3. Pleasure

Aired: 5/19/2001

Trevor has an unreachable itch on his back, which the other Pets refuse to scratch. Frustrated, he decides to use an unconventional method to get rid of it that leaves one of the Pets suffering from a nervous breakdown.

4. American Beauty

Aired: 5/26/2001

Hamish discovers that Trevor has placed a poor bet in his name with money borrowed from a violent, psychopathic criminal who expects to be payed back. Terrified, Hamish begins many failed attempts to commit suicide before the moneylender arrives.

5. On Hold

Aired: 6/2/2001

Hamish finds himself being held in an excessively long queue on the phone in his attempt to make a call.

6. Consider Yourself

Aired: 6/9/2001

In a parody of Sherlock Holmes, Trevor tells JP the story of his Victorian ancestor; a detective who discovered the identity of Jack The Ripper.

7. The Miracle

Aired: 6/16/2001

When an archangel unblocks the downstairs toilet, Hamish insists the house become religious as an act of respect.

8. Conspiracy Theory

Aired: 6/23/2001

While watching a television documentary about John F. Kennedy, the Pets' power supply is cut off. Cue a flashback to the 1960s, featuring relations of the Pets on holiday in a house identical to the modern day version in Dallas, who witness the president's assassination and attempt to discover the identity of the perpetrator.

9. Constipation

Aired: 6/30/2001

After suffering from constipation for fourteen months, Hamish reluctantly tries Trevor's suggestion of eating a pair of tights in order to cure himself.

10. Death

Trevor dies after choking on a fishbone. Later, however, all of the other Pets are able to see him as a ghost.

11. Halloween

JP holds a Halloween party in the living room. Meanwhile, Hamish attempts to cryogenically freeze himself, in order to awaken in the future.

12. Hostage

Hamish goes over the edge and holds JP hostage, much to the bewilderment of Davina and Trevor, who are forced to negotiate with him.

13. Money

When Trevor finds a suitcase full of money under the floorboards, he and Hamish conspire to kill Davina and JP and keep the money for themselves. However, both begin plotting to also double-cross each other.